TRANSCRIPT
DJT PLUNGED -10.09%. You heard me. Ten percent off! All because Donald posted about golf and a guy named David ripping the reflecting pool. The market didn’t care about your socialism fears; it cared that DJT lost eleven billion dollars in real-time. SPY edged down -0.05%, barely twitching while the former president’s stock tanked harder than his approval ratings. VIXY dropped, meaning everyone is terrified you’re actually serious about this golf rant. We have a leader posting 12 times an hour and a portfolio that bleeds red faster than a Democrat’s eye. This isn’t news; it’s financial suicide with hashtags.